Thursday, February 16, 2017

The Weaver

What is God weaving together in you? That is the question that keeps rolling around in my mind throughout today. I can't seem to let it go. The words keep repeating like a broken record.
What is He calling out into your destiny? 
What is He speaking into your life?

When you look over today, last year, or through your lifetime, do you see God weaving His hands through your life; just as the day He knit you together with such precision and care. (Psalm 139:13)

I'm always in awe when He shows Himself. Sometimes it's in the little small voice inside, or in the way my Littles love on me (especially when I'm undeserving), or the way my husband forgives me with abundant grace, or sometimes in the big undeniable ways that He is God.

Today is another one of those days, where He was showing His hand. He's still there, weaving out all the details, big and small

He's still knitting, still speaking even when life feels messy; I feel messy, like I'm not enough, or maybe I'm just too much. When marriage seems hard or energy runs short keeping up with daily Momhood...He's there.

My husband recently took Facebook off his phone. He hated how it was an automatic response when he was bored. It's kind of like going to open up the fridge to see what's inside even when you're not hungry. His description, of course! He started replacing his instincts to pull out his phone, by looking around to see what he might be missing if he had otherwise been glued to his device. 

One evening this week, he stopped at Costco on his way home from work. We've been trying out a bunch of new recipes and he was thinking about Salmon and really wanted to know the best way to cook it. He felt the need to pull out his phone and Google all the ways to prepare salmon, but instead he looked around and saw a woman standing there with package of salmon in her hands, so he asked her advice on the best way to make it. She not only told him a simple and tasty way that left us wanting more, but then continued into more conversation. It was a moment to connect with a person instead of a screen. 

What are we missing in our every day? Are we paying attention to the details? To what God is doing today or in our tomorrows? He brings everything together to completion. (Philippians 1:6)

I have felt so overwhelmed with life. There seems to be too many irons in the fire in our household. There have been a lot of decisions, lots of change, lots of uncertainties. I know God is not quiet. He's still speaking, but I still feel pushed out to the end of the plank, not sure if I'm jumping into the known or the unknown, although I know He knows, I'm left feeling insecure

Then God takes my heart and pulls me close. The details matter. The threads of the garment interlace together and I start to see glimpses of the garment [my life] being made together by the Maker.

Today, I sat in a pediatric ophthalmologist office with our 8 month old. I looked around and felt so blessed. I shouldn't be here, I thought. Our Livie has had a plugged tear duct since birth and we had been referred out. It's a minor thing, obviously, and her eye had even seemed to improve days prior. I sat there thinking the appointment was such a waste as I waited in the waiting room with a restless, on the move baby. But knowing my Maker and how this appointment or date and time was not set up by me, I went ahead.  

They dilated her eyes and found that her left eye is much weaker than the right in vision. There is a distinct difference in astigmatism and left untreated much longer, she was looking at having a lazy eye that may require surgery in the future, much similar to my husband and sister had when they were younger. 

And all those times I thought, 'Why can't the Lord just heal this tiny thing. Healing a tear duct is nothing for Him.' And there is the details. The answer. 

The Lord was showing me He's still in control. He is in the details. He knows the number of hairs on my head details. He knows my heart and fear details. He wants to show us how much He loves us details. 

Then it goes back to all those irons aren't uncertain to Him.

As we are go on week 2 of illness in our house and so many little stresses start rising up before the day begins, as I start to buckle under the pressure, I can ask and look to the Lord, "What are you doing?" "What is going on?" 
I know today is a small thread of the woven garment. 

So again I ask....

What is God weaving together in you? 
What do you see? 
Do you see the details? 
Do you see our Maker intertwining the good, the bad, the ordinary? 

It's all there. 
The One who created this world and your heart is weaving together something in you. 

What is He calling out? 
What is He speaking? 


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